Maybe I should prepare the boat

Rain, rain, rain. It has been raining off and on for over 2 weeks now. This morning a house fell of a cliff, the 405 freeway started to buckle, a tornado touched down in Oxnard and huge sections of roadway are being washed away by water or mud slides. It is getting worse by the hour.
These crazy Californians aren’t used to being stuck indoors for more than a few days at a time. I think some of them have hit their breaking point, I saw some bizarre things going on today. I saw a lady walking her dog in full rain gear, not her, the dog! Her dog was dressed in a yellow plastic rain slicker with matching hat and boots. I wondered how long it took her to wrestle the dog into that outfit. She, on the other hand was wearing a sweatshirt (soaked) and Ugg boots (not waterproof). I also saw a man jogging! There is standing water everywhere and he was running through water about 5 inches deep. For gods sake, join a gym!
Yesterday a lady decided to ignore the “Road Closed” signs and barricades. She drove around them and ended up stuck in water up to the hood of her car. She and her three children had to climb on top of the car and wait for the Fire Dept’s helicopter to come and rescue them. The mother couldn’t hang onto the rope and her two year old at the same time and ended up dropping the baby. They found him a couple of hours later. They are talking about charging her with Negligent Homicide. I hope they do, what an idiot!
People are so impatient. It is winter and the weather is supposed to be bad. Just relax, stay dry, be safe and have some patience.
Gotta run, my pizza is late and I need to call and complain. Where is that damn delivery boy anyway!?!