Monday, January 31, 2005
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Friday, January 28, 2005
Nick is having a Birthday!!!!!
Today is Nick’s birthday. My baby, my first-born is 14 years old. It seems like I was just taking him to his first day of kindergarten, and now we are looking at the first day of High School.
I was in labor with him for 3 days. It was awful (most labor is). We lived in a small rural town and my doctor was on vacation. The attending physician kept sending me home even though I was having contractions every 5 minutes. He said my cervix was not dilating. At about the 60 hr mark I told my husband we were “going to the hospital and I wasn’t leaving until I had a baby.” When I arrived at the hospital they informed me that the doctor was on his way back from the airport and he wanted them to admit me. I was two weeks overdue and he was not pleased that they had let me go on this long. He checked me and said he could feel the baby’s head but my cervix was only dilating on one side. That one side was almost fully dilated. He told me he needed to manually dilate me and of course at that point I didn’t give a rats ass. Never again! That was the most painful thing I have ever experienced. I can’t even explain it. It sent sharp pains down to my toes, paralyzing pain. I try to be kind in all situations, but this time I couldn’t hold it in. I finally said something like “Why don’t you just take off your coat and climb in!” Finally, fully dilated, I felt the urge to push. I pushed, pushed, and pushed some more. After almost 3 days with out sleep and after 3 hrs of pushing I couldn’t go anymore. Every time I would stop pushing, Nick would slide back up. The doctor asked the nurse to call OR and have them prepare for a C-section. I begged for one more chance and I pushed until I burst blood vessels in my eyes. Several more pushed produces a head but his shoulders were stuck. They had to break his collarbone and in return he (Nick) broke my tailbone. When he was placed on my stomach I was so happy that I forgot the pain I was feeling. He was beautiful. His head, even after 3 hours of pushing was perfectly round (except for a moon shaped bulge where he had pushed against my half dilated cervix.) He had a dimple in his chin just like my dad and he was wide-eyed. The entire stay in the hospital he cried, little did I know that he would cry non-stop for 6 months. I didn’t care, I was in love.
Nick and I have a special bond; we are too much alike sometimes. He was my little buddy, we actually grew up together. Things are changing quickly for him and I am the one having the trouble with it. I wanted him to be my “little helper” forever.
He is becoming a young man and I only want the best for him. I know I can’t make decisions for him, but I am trying to help him make the right ones. It is very hard for me to let go of the little boy who once needed me for everything. Whatever happened to the little boy who wanted to live with me until he was 66?
HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TO THE MAN OF THE HOUSE!!
I LOVE YOU MORE!!!!
Birthday menu: Breakfast was orange juice and B.P. (breakfast pizza). It sounded horrible when he requested it but ended up being yummy. It was crust, light pizza sauce, scrambled eggs, bacon, and cheese. Lunch was (I didn’t forget) a bagel with cream cheese and pepperoni, juice, celery with peanut butter, and Fire Hot Cheetos. For dinner he has asked to go to The Olive Garden. He and his best friend want to wear ties, with their t-shirts of course.
I was in labor with him for 3 days. It was awful (most labor is). We lived in a small rural town and my doctor was on vacation. The attending physician kept sending me home even though I was having contractions every 5 minutes. He said my cervix was not dilating. At about the 60 hr mark I told my husband we were “going to the hospital and I wasn’t leaving until I had a baby.” When I arrived at the hospital they informed me that the doctor was on his way back from the airport and he wanted them to admit me. I was two weeks overdue and he was not pleased that they had let me go on this long. He checked me and said he could feel the baby’s head but my cervix was only dilating on one side. That one side was almost fully dilated. He told me he needed to manually dilate me and of course at that point I didn’t give a rats ass. Never again! That was the most painful thing I have ever experienced. I can’t even explain it. It sent sharp pains down to my toes, paralyzing pain. I try to be kind in all situations, but this time I couldn’t hold it in. I finally said something like “Why don’t you just take off your coat and climb in!” Finally, fully dilated, I felt the urge to push. I pushed, pushed, and pushed some more. After almost 3 days with out sleep and after 3 hrs of pushing I couldn’t go anymore. Every time I would stop pushing, Nick would slide back up. The doctor asked the nurse to call OR and have them prepare for a C-section. I begged for one more chance and I pushed until I burst blood vessels in my eyes. Several more pushed produces a head but his shoulders were stuck. They had to break his collarbone and in return he (Nick) broke my tailbone. When he was placed on my stomach I was so happy that I forgot the pain I was feeling. He was beautiful. His head, even after 3 hours of pushing was perfectly round (except for a moon shaped bulge where he had pushed against my half dilated cervix.) He had a dimple in his chin just like my dad and he was wide-eyed. The entire stay in the hospital he cried, little did I know that he would cry non-stop for 6 months. I didn’t care, I was in love.
Nick and I have a special bond; we are too much alike sometimes. He was my little buddy, we actually grew up together. Things are changing quickly for him and I am the one having the trouble with it. I wanted him to be my “little helper” forever.
He is becoming a young man and I only want the best for him. I know I can’t make decisions for him, but I am trying to help him make the right ones. It is very hard for me to let go of the little boy who once needed me for everything. Whatever happened to the little boy who wanted to live with me until he was 66?
HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TO THE MAN OF THE HOUSE!!
I LOVE YOU MORE!!!!
Birthday menu: Breakfast was orange juice and B.P. (breakfast pizza). It sounded horrible when he requested it but ended up being yummy. It was crust, light pizza sauce, scrambled eggs, bacon, and cheese. Lunch was (I didn’t forget) a bagel with cream cheese and pepperoni, juice, celery with peanut butter, and Fire Hot Cheetos. For dinner he has asked to go to The Olive Garden. He and his best friend want to wear ties, with their t-shirts of course.
Thursday, January 27, 2005
I am so uncool...
that my son is embarrassed by me even though we are the only ones home. During our homework marathon tonight Devon was on a role. He was HOT and the answers were coming quick. Everytime he would get one right he would say "Whoop, there it is!" I was getting very excited too, this is a new thing for him (understanding his work on his own). I just couldn't contain myself any longer. The next right answer and I was out of the kitchen and doing a little dance. It ended with a very cool (or so I thought) "Whoop, there it is!" Devon's face scrunched up and he said "Moooom, please don't do that, it's not right. Even though we're the only ones home you're really embarrassing me."
Wow, how bad is that?!
Wow, how bad is that?!
This is "what kind of sexy" I am?! How about you?
You Are Fun SexyYou're funny, quirky, cute, and sassy.Guys always have a great time with you, and that alone is sexy.You've got an upbeat, optimistic spirit that totally shines through.Any guy would be crazy to turn you down! What Kind of Sexy Are You? Take This Quiz :-)Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance. |  |
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
This is soo NOT funny
Tonight the boys and I watched American Idol. We love to watch it together and laugh. After the last couple of days at work my nerves are shot and dealing with a teenager just about puts me over the edge. Nick insisted on talking through the entire show. He asked me questions about Bob Marley and Jimi Hendrix. He asked me why they call pot "bud". He asked me if our toenails really grow after we die. He asked me how long it will take for his pimple to go away and if I think he will grow taller than his dad. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! I was just about to flip out and tape his mouth shut when he got quiet. I took a few deep breaths (which by the way does NOT calm me down) and settled in to watch the show. All of the sudden Nick jumps out of his chair and starts into his Pink Floyd/Casualties/ Elvis impersonation. It was so hideous that I had to laugh, for a second. I forget that laughter is encouraging. He continued his "act". I finally snapped "stop, Stop, STOPPPP!" I gave him my "I can't take anymore" speech followed by the "It's my cranky time" speech. We managed to make it through the last 10 minutes of the show. I could tell Nick was struggling to control himself and on the way down the hall he breaks into song. As he gets to the door of his bedroom he shakes his butt and sings something about riding his bicycle. It was so ridiculous that I had to laugh. It made me feel better even though I kept telling myself "This is so not funny". I want to go to bed.
GOODNIGHT!
GOODNIGHT!
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Who could ask for anything more?
I was soooo glad to be off work today that even the traffic on the drive home didn’t bother me. We get off work at 4:00 so we beat it most of the time. The drive home was slow today but I just turned up the music and sang away!
I picked up Devon at school and headed to the grocery store. I had put a roast in the crock-pot this morning and I knew it would be waiting when we got home. When we walked in the front door the whole house smelled like burnt meat! I knew immediately that something was wrong. My lucky crock-pot would not let me down. I walked into the kitchen to find my lovely, white tile counters, covered with blood and beef broth, along with some onion slices and spices. My “pot” had cracked down the side! I don’t know how or why but I am devastated! I have had this crock-pot for 15 yrs. It is ugly and small but it is special to me. Two years ago I entered my first “chili cook-off” and took 3rd place. This last year I took 1st place and I chalk it up to my lucky crock-pot (It was honestly, my second time to ever make chili). Along with 1st place, I also got a ribbon for the ugliest crock-pot. I vowed to continue using it even though I really need a bigger one.
I did manage to save the roast, kind of.
After I bleached the tile on my counter I needed to do a load of laundry. I threw the messy rags in the washer and finished dinner. On my way down the hall to tell the boys to wash up, I felt wet, squishy carpet. My washer was leaking and the hall was flooded. I got the clean towels out of my bathroom and tried to soak up as much water as possible. I ended up pulling the carpet up and setting fans on both sides of the hall.
I cried. I had just had it and I couldn’t take anymore. I cried again. Finally, when the tears were gone I felt this huge relief and then this huge gush! Uh huh, my period! What more can I say, a perfectly awful ending to a perfectly awful day!
I picked up Devon at school and headed to the grocery store. I had put a roast in the crock-pot this morning and I knew it would be waiting when we got home. When we walked in the front door the whole house smelled like burnt meat! I knew immediately that something was wrong. My lucky crock-pot would not let me down. I walked into the kitchen to find my lovely, white tile counters, covered with blood and beef broth, along with some onion slices and spices. My “pot” had cracked down the side! I don’t know how or why but I am devastated! I have had this crock-pot for 15 yrs. It is ugly and small but it is special to me. Two years ago I entered my first “chili cook-off” and took 3rd place. This last year I took 1st place and I chalk it up to my lucky crock-pot (It was honestly, my second time to ever make chili). Along with 1st place, I also got a ribbon for the ugliest crock-pot. I vowed to continue using it even though I really need a bigger one.
I did manage to save the roast, kind of.
After I bleached the tile on my counter I needed to do a load of laundry. I threw the messy rags in the washer and finished dinner. On my way down the hall to tell the boys to wash up, I felt wet, squishy carpet. My washer was leaking and the hall was flooded. I got the clean towels out of my bathroom and tried to soak up as much water as possible. I ended up pulling the carpet up and setting fans on both sides of the hall.
I cried. I had just had it and I couldn’t take anymore. I cried again. Finally, when the tears were gone I felt this huge relief and then this huge gush! Uh huh, my period! What more can I say, a perfectly awful ending to a perfectly awful day!
Anyone see my marbles rolling by?
The lady I share my office with is out for two week due to knee surgery. This means I am working with the boss’s wife. She is a lovely Belgian lady about 70 yrs old. She hasn’t worked here for years, speaks broken English and…well, this means I am doing all the work. This morning she asked me a question that was only half in English. When she saw the look on my face she said “Oh, Flemish just came out of my mouth”. Of course I immediately looked at my shirt, searching for phlegm!
I am not easily rattled but I feel like I may cry at any minute. My heart is racing, I am all flustered, and I feel like I am being buried alive. Is this what it feels like when you “loose it”?
I am not easily rattled but I feel like I may cry at any minute. My heart is racing, I am all flustered, and I feel like I am being buried alive. Is this what it feels like when you “loose it”?
Monday, January 24, 2005
It's Monday...
the most depressing day of the week.
I hated this weekend to end.
The weather was perfect.
The kids and I have a Sunday tradition. We get on our bikes about 11:00 and ride down to the Farmers Market for some VERY good Mexican food. If it is raining we will drive and get the food to go, we must have our gorditas! Then we wander around and pick out our fruits and veggies for the week. We usually ride our goodies home and turn around and ride back to the Harbor. Twice a month my favorite local artist (T.R) plays at “Sea Fresh” which is a fresh fish market and restaurant upstairs. They have a great patio that sits on the water. T.R. starts performing on the patio at 1:00 and ends at 4:00. That is the perfect time for heading home to start dinner. Yesterday we decided to take advantage of the weather (they are forecasting rain later in the week) and stayed to have a bowl of seafood chowder. Well, I had the chowder; the boys had chicken and fries (it’s a shame they don’t like fish!). We rode our bikes home and settled in for our Sunday evening. I made cookies and we ate them with ice cream while we watched “Extreme Home Makeover”. Then, off to bed where I snuggled in and watched a little Court TV. It was a good day. Damn Monday has to ruin it all!
I hated this weekend to end.
The weather was perfect.
The kids and I have a Sunday tradition. We get on our bikes about 11:00 and ride down to the Farmers Market for some VERY good Mexican food. If it is raining we will drive and get the food to go, we must have our gorditas! Then we wander around and pick out our fruits and veggies for the week. We usually ride our goodies home and turn around and ride back to the Harbor. Twice a month my favorite local artist (T.R) plays at “Sea Fresh” which is a fresh fish market and restaurant upstairs. They have a great patio that sits on the water. T.R. starts performing on the patio at 1:00 and ends at 4:00. That is the perfect time for heading home to start dinner. Yesterday we decided to take advantage of the weather (they are forecasting rain later in the week) and stayed to have a bowl of seafood chowder. Well, I had the chowder; the boys had chicken and fries (it’s a shame they don’t like fish!). We rode our bikes home and settled in for our Sunday evening. I made cookies and we ate them with ice cream while we watched “Extreme Home Makeover”. Then, off to bed where I snuggled in and watched a little Court TV. It was a good day. Damn Monday has to ruin it all!
Thursday, January 20, 2005
I should shut up now
When I walked into his office this morning, my boss was eating a sandwich. He asked me “Do you want some tuna for breakfast?” I replied, “No thanks, I have my own.” He just stared blankly at me. I fumbled for words and said “Well, I don’t really have a tuna sandwich, oh dear, never mind!” I don’t know what I was thinking! It was my attempt at vulgar humor and my brain was clearly, still asleep. Unfortunately, my mouth was wide-awake! I am very embarrassed and haven’t spoken to him since. I’m sure he is wondering what is wrong with me and making arrangements for drug testing.
Geez, I am such a dork!!
Geez, I am such a dork!!
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Not working out
My feet and my breasts are ready to go, the rest of my body just won’t cooperate!
I bought a new Jogbra and new running shoes so I could begin jogging again (as if I was a serious jogger before). I made several mistakes this morning:
1. I didn’t break in my new shoes
2. I didn’t realize that at 4:30 a.m. my body would need more of a warm up than the usual stretch or two.
By the end of my short jog this morning the only things that felt like it had gotten a workout were my sore feet and my even sorer (is that a word?) breasts! I was very glad it was dark. I looked like my mother trying to catch the mailman- arms and legs flailing (probably in different directions). Lord knows I am lucky I didn’t throw my back out. Working-out is not working-out, but what are my options at that time in the morning?
I bought a new Jogbra and new running shoes so I could begin jogging again (as if I was a serious jogger before). I made several mistakes this morning:
1. I didn’t break in my new shoes
2. I didn’t realize that at 4:30 a.m. my body would need more of a warm up than the usual stretch or two.
By the end of my short jog this morning the only things that felt like it had gotten a workout were my sore feet and my even sorer (is that a word?) breasts! I was very glad it was dark. I looked like my mother trying to catch the mailman- arms and legs flailing (probably in different directions). Lord knows I am lucky I didn’t throw my back out. Working-out is not working-out, but what are my options at that time in the morning?
Monday, January 17, 2005
Enjoy Martha Lutin Day!
When Nick was in 2nd grade, he came home from school on Friday waving a yellow paper. He was very excited and told me he didn’t have school on Monday. He continued to wave his paper and proudly announced “Monday is Martha Lutin Day”. He wasn’t really sure who “she” was but he was happy to celebrate “her” day.
Saturday, January 15, 2005
That's what I'm talking about!
Oh the joy, the smile it brought to my face...being in control.
Living with a teenager can make you feel like you are loosing control sometimes. They walk around, causing emotional havoc, whining, complaining until you think you will just freak out. Drama, drama, drama!
I had Nick and 3 friends in the car, doors locked, driving down the road and I got revenge! I put in my Michael McDonald CD and cranked the volume to 45. They nearly died! They couldn't get out of the car fast enough. I heard Nick's friend "Fro boy" say "Dude, your mom has bad music." Hehehe, oh the joy!
Score: Nick- 1 Mom-1
Friday, January 14, 2005
Mom needs a time-out!
Last night as I am TRYING to make dinner, Nick is standing on the other side of the bar watching me cook and asking questions. We had this conversation:
“Is dinner ready yet?” “No, I am working on it”
“What’s for dinner?” “Spaghetti with meatballs and salad”
“Can we have French bread too?” “Yes”
“Can’t we have something else?” “No, this is what we are eating tonight”
“I will eat a Hot Pocket” “No you won’t”
“How long until it’s ready?” “Much sooner if you go find something else to do”
“I don’t want to much sauce on mine” “I know, I won’t try to kill you”
“Did you know that pasta is a carb?” “Yes, I do”
“What is in the meatballs?” “Meat, parmesan cheese, egg, and garlic”
“Oh”
“Is that how you normally make them?” “Yes”
“How much longer, I am really hungry” “Half an hour, go wash up”
“Why? I have half an hour” Silence
“OK, I’ll go wash”
Then poor Devon walked in and asked “What’s for dinner?”
“ For crying out loud! We are having Goat Testicle Stew, now go wash you hands”
I heard him ask Nick in the bathroom “What’s a goat testicle?”
“Is dinner ready yet?” “No, I am working on it”
“What’s for dinner?” “Spaghetti with meatballs and salad”
“Can we have French bread too?” “Yes”
“Can’t we have something else?” “No, this is what we are eating tonight”
“I will eat a Hot Pocket” “No you won’t”
“How long until it’s ready?” “Much sooner if you go find something else to do”
“I don’t want to much sauce on mine” “I know, I won’t try to kill you”
“Did you know that pasta is a carb?” “Yes, I do”
“What is in the meatballs?” “Meat, parmesan cheese, egg, and garlic”
“Oh”
“Is that how you normally make them?” “Yes”
“How much longer, I am really hungry” “Half an hour, go wash up”
“Why? I have half an hour” Silence
“OK, I’ll go wash”
Then poor Devon walked in and asked “What’s for dinner?”
“ For crying out loud! We are having Goat Testicle Stew, now go wash you hands”
I heard him ask Nick in the bathroom “What’s a goat testicle?”
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